12/16/08 10:48AM PST

yeah, i miss skiing

i'm in the same boat

me too!

it's such a cool feeling

apparently snowblades aren't snowblades any more. they're skiboards now if i want to keep doing them. the makers of "snowblades", salomon, stopped making them when everybody realized they were gay

i apparently did not get the memo

09/29/08 11:29AM PST

did the bailout bill really fail or do ppl believe it will fail?

no, it really failed
global economy is crashing right now

maybe we'll just have to kill every chinese citizen

no, we're going to be serving them fries soon

that's why we drop the bombs now
30
spread out over their island and pay them back for hiroshima and nagasaki

there are so many things wrong with that sentence

Kafka: Three Parables

2. "...'What do you want to know now?' asks the doorkeeper, 'you are insatiable.' 'Everyone strives to attain the Law,' answers the man, 'how does it come about, then, that in all these years no one has come seeking admittance but me?' The doorkeeper perceives that the man is at the end of his strength and that his hearing is failing, so he bellows in his ear: 'No one but you could gain admittance through this door, since this door was intended only for you. I am now going to shut it.'..."

08/29/08 9:59PM PST

off topic, but you want to hear something ironic? one of my professors is like one of the most important christian thinkers in america

haha, I bet that's fantaaastic

he doesn't mention it at all. he's actually quite brilliant. if i hadn't googled him, i would have never known

http://www.dwillard.org/

I'm pretty sure most of my professors are one of the most important Big Mac thinkers at the local McDonalds or something like that

haha you just made me spill beer on myself

lol SUCCESS!

Porno Spam

After all, babbington was elderly, and his health an ancient
hopi stopping placecists. See storage quickly into the room,
where she stayed while heavy a task. What was he doing there
at all? Manner. Let us take a lantern, and see what has
rough prison food, being ordered about by harsh, and the
opportunity was lost, as she was to leave of others. Richard
abernethie had not given him always arrived first. Where
should i set up? She economy of the emperor, in not going
to war with would begin in three minutes. The next moment
to go to men's offices, trying with her pretty few words
something Max koblin turned his head so much as their silly
songs, after we've fed lessened the light for a little while,
though spend their lives within the subterranean passages.
the land, if you let down a soundingline you will full red
lips. I just kissed him. She paused in from this man maenck
received the password that another. Why warn the waverlys
beforehand? Why.

07/23/08 12:25PM PST

stanzas 3, 5, 9, 10, 14 are broken

you're broken
or i'll break you in half
bitch
what now
that's too many fucking stanzas anyway i don't have 14 stanzas
AAAAAAAAAH
AAAAAAAAAH
BLASLBASGALSGJKSLGG

no, you have 14

SHUTTTTTTUP ZI'MGOINGTOFUCKINGKILLYOUJUSTKIDDINGBUTSERIOUSLYOURGOINGTOFUCKING DIE

i thought 14 was appropriate for a soliloquy

DONTFEARTHEREAPERZYOUR
WHATS A SOLILOQUY

err, sonnet. sorry, i swapped terms accidentally.

Sonnet
Structure
* 14 lines
* Iambic Pentameter
* static rhyme scheme

shakespeare papschmear
i'm in love
shakespeare was half gay he can't feel love

hopefully she doesn't get all caught up in the bad pentameter. i know it'd kill the mood for me
i'd probably dry up like the sahara

oh i'm going to fuck you up
i'm going to walk to california tonight
and kill you

AutoCont

Everyone is a brain box on something. We are brain boxes on IT.

http://www.autocont.com/home.cml

6/16/08 3:00PM PST

like you know when you break your arm

or your leg i guess
you straighten it out with a piece of wood or whatever
perhaps J could use one of these
or try not to O.D. on viagra
either way

i remember when my grandma used to get aarp catalogues, they would sell dick splints like you're imagining

you're kidding

nope

holy shit
hahaha

dick splint
what a wonderful phrase

lol

i think that might surpass twat snot at this point

shut up you fucking dick splint

see, it works well

i think it does
nice one

i think we have inaugurated a new era just now

wow, you're absolutely right, i can feel it
i can't wait to say that to someone face to face

"The Plot Against America" by Philip Roth

It went without saying that Mr. Mawhinney was a Christian, a long-standing member of the great overpowering majority that fought the Revolution and founded the nation and conquered the wilderness and subjugated the Indian and enslaved the Negro and emancipated the Negro and segregated the Negro, one of the good, clean, hard-working Christian millions who settled the frontier, tilled the farms, built the cities, governed the states, sat in Congress, occupied the White House, amassed the wealth, possessed the land, owned the steel mills and the ball clubs and the railroads and the banks, even owned and oversaw the language, one of those unassailable Nordic and Anglo-Saxon Protestants who ran American and would always run it--generals, dignitaries, magnates, tycoons, the men who laid down the law and called the shots and read the riot act when they chose to--while my father, of course, was only a Jew.

Sample CA Ballot Measure

01. Shall Los Angeles County be declared the sun and leisure capital of the world? Yes/No

5/28/08 12:48PM PST

i think i'm dying

what do you mean?

i pooped out a full bell pepper

and i swear to god man that pepper wasn't whole when i ate it